Premarital Sex in Calvin’s Geneva

lydiaandherwickham
I am continuing to work through Kingdon and Witte’s book on marriage in Geneva. 
 

Chapter 12 addresses how Geneva approached the period of time between engagement and marriage, including how premarital sex was handled, as well as desertion during the engagement. This post will only address premarital sex.

This time included heightened sexual tension therefore the “Genevan authorities regulated this perilous interval in some detail.” One of the difficulties Geneva ran into was that they treated this period like a marriage except you could not have sex. For example, if an engaged woman slept with someone who was not her spouse to be, it was adultery, not fornication. To get out of an engagement was like getting a divorce. Yet despite all these trappings of marriage, a couple was still supposed to refrain from sex until the wedding day.  Continue reading

And They Approve Those Who Practice Such Things

Sheep 2

Can you be an unrepentant, practicing homosexual and a follower of Jesus Christ?   I want to answer this question and then follow it up with a second, perhaps more pertinent question, what if a person doesn’t practice sodomy, but approves of those who do? Just to be clear I am discussing how to deal with those who claim to be Christians yet either practice homosexuality or approve of those who do. I am not talking about how to interact with non-Christians on the subject.

Sexual Immorality Keeps You Out of the Kingdom

You shall not lie with a male as with a woman; it is an abomination.
(Lev 18:22)

For you may be sure of this, that everyone who is sexually immoral or impure, or who is covetous (that is, an idolater), has no inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God. (Ephesians 5:5)

Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. (1Cor. 6:9-10)

Blessed are those who wash their robes, so that they may have the right to the tree of life and that they may enter the city by the gates. Outside are the dogs and sorcerers and the sexually immoral and murderers and idolaters, and everyone who loves and practices falsehood (Rev 22:14-15)

An unrepentant sinner of any kind is bound for Hell. This includes thieves, liars, drunkards, and the sexually immoral, such as practicing homosexuals, adulterers, porn addicts, and lesbians. Just to cut off “but what about,” I am not talking about a man struggling with his sin, fighting it, sometimes winning and sometimes losing. Nor am I talking about a new Christian or immature Christian who does not understand what the Scriptures teach nor has learned how to wage war on sin. I remember hearing of a Christian couple, new to the faith, who were living together unmarried. They had no idea it was wrong, until a pastor told them. That is not the situation I am talking about. Continue reading

Nowhere to Hide

Question-Marks-1024x600.jpg

Earlier this month, Eugene Peterson, a former pastor and prominent Christian author, who has written numerous books including The Message, was asked about same-sex marriage in an interview. In that interview he said he would be fine with performing a same-sex marriage. When word got out there was an uproar. He quickly retracted the statement, but of the retraction one friend said:

Peterson’s retraction was not clear, Biblical, or faithful to Christ especially when there is so much confusion and false teaching on homosexuality. Al Mohler wrote a piece outlining the situation, but it is his final three points that I want to repost here. They are worth pondering as all of us will eventually be forced to answer the question, “What do you think about same sex marriage, homosexuality, and gender?”

Consider these lessons from Eugene Peterson’s ordeal.

First, there is nowhere to hide. Every pastor, every Christian leader, every author  — even every believer — will have to answer the question. The question cannot simply be about same-sex marriage. The question is about whether or not the believer is willing to declare and defend God’s revealed plan for human sexuality and gender as clearly revealed in the Bible.

Second, you had better have your answer ready. Evasive, wandering, and inconclusive answers will be seen for what they are. Those who have fled for security to the house of evasion must know that the structure has crumbled. It always does.

Third, if you will stand for the Bible’s clear teachings on sexuality and gender, you had better be ready to answer the same way over and over and over again. The question will come back again and again, in hopes that you have finally decided to “get on the right side of history.” Faithfulness requires consistency — that “long obedience in the same direction.”

That is what it means to be a disciple of Christ, as Eugene Peterson has now taught us—in more ways than one.

If someone asks what you believe about same-sex marriage, sodomy, and gender are you ready to give the Biblical answer? If they ask again will you give the same answer? If they ask during an interview that will be published will you give the same answer? If your boss asks during Gay Pride Month will you give the same answer? Or will you evade, wiggle around, refuse to be clear, put it off to another day,  or act embarrassed about the Scripture’s teaching?  If you don’t know what the Bible teaches, figure it out. If you know, but don’t have the backbone to say it out loud, then you better grow one. Because one day the mic will be in front of you.

The Undefiled Marriage Bed

unmade-bed

Recently, I preached on Hebrews 13:4:

Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.

How do we keep the marriage bed undefiled? What should a Christian sexual relationship look like? When we ask this question we tend to begin with the sins. Is this a sin? Is that a sin? But that complicates things. The truth is simple to understand, but hard to live out due to our wayward hearts. The only proper sexual expression is between one and one woman within marriage. Every other form of sexual expression is a sin. Fornication, adultery, bestiality, rape, masturbation, sodomy, lesbianism, multiple wives, and pornography are all sins by the standard that is set in Genesis 1-2. One man and one woman in a marriage covenant until one is dead is the boundary for Christian sexual activity.

This does not mean that all of these sins are equal in their sinfulness. Is fornication as bad as adultery? No. Is adultery as bad as sodomy? No. Does this mean divorce is always wrong? No. Does this mean it is impossible to sin against your spouse sexually and yet remain sexually faithful? No. A spouse can never sleep around or look at porn and still be sinning in the marriage bed.  And yet despite all the “but what abouts” the Lord has given us a paradigm in Genesis 1-2. We love to find loopholes. What is allowed? What can I get away with? Is it really that a big a deal if I masturbate, watch a little porn, or flirt with the married man at work? However, our goal should not be to see how much we can get away with. Instead we should be striving for and teaching the standard the Lord set up: one man and one woman married to one another and faithful to one another in heart, mind, and body until death separates them. The question should not be how close is this to the line, but rather how close does my life conform to the Biblical standard.

We Deny. We Do Not Affirm.

same-sex-marriageReading this previous post will expand on and clarify some of what I say below. 

Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God. (1Co 6:9-11)

More and more professing Christians affirm homosexual relationships. Jen Hatmaker was the most recent high profile Christian to say that she thought same-sex relationships can be “holy.”  Following this train there have been some, while not affirming same-sex relationships themselves, say that sodomy and lesbianism are not issues worth dividing over. Sodomy may be wrong, but it does not put someone outside the kingdom of Christ. In other words you can affirm same-sex relationships and still be a Christian. Is this true? Is sodomy an issue where Christians can agree to disagree like baptism? The answer is no. Someone who is an active homosexual or lesbian has no inheritance in the kingdom of God.  Continue reading

Sexual Purity & the Seventh Commandment: Heidelberg Catechism~Lord’s Day 41

lipstick

This Sunday is the 41st Lord’s Day in 2016. The Heidelberg Catechism reading for this Sunday is:

Q. What does the seventh commandment teach us?

A. That God condemns all unchastity, and that therefore we should thoroughly detest it and live decent and chaste lives, within or outside of the holy state of marriage.

Q. Does God, in this commandment, forbid only such scandalous sins as adultery?

A. We are temples of the Holy Spirit, body and soul, and God wants both to be kept clean and holy. That is why God forbids all unchaste actions, looks, talk, thoughts, or desires, and whatever may incite someone to them.

Kevin DeYoung sets the stage by saying:

Is there any command more ridiculed in our culture than the Seventh Commandment? Adultery is a joke; homosexuality is a right; sex before marriage is the norm; no fault divorce and remarriage is assumed; bestiality is increasingly considered avant gard. This is the world we live in. Sex has always been a leading vote-getter in the most popular sin contest, but never before in this country has sexual deviance been made to look so normal and God’s standard make to look so obscene…The Seventh Commandment is not just broken in this country; it’s being smashed to pieces.

Our bodies are rarely pure, much less our thoughts and desires. We are so at home with sexual immorality in our TV shows and music, but perhaps more deadly in our churches. The Heidelberg says we should “thoroughly detest unchastity. We are not encouraged to a mild disdain for sexual immorality. But to a deep, abiding hatred of lust. We are not encouraged to a casual approach to sexual purity, but to a whole-hearted pursuit of it. Is that our attitude towards sexual immorality? How many of us detest the idea of getting caught looking porn, but do not detest the porn itself? How many of us hate that a friend or spouse might see us lusting after that girl in yoga pants or that guy in a tight jeans, but do not hate the fact that we want to lust after her/him? For most of us, the consequences of sexual sin are what we hate, not the sin itself. Until we learn to hate the sin and the desires that give birth to those sins we will never gain the victory.  Continue reading